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Icetips Article



Par2: Police Comments
1926-04-25 -- A.N. Other
 
The following 15 Police Comments were taken off of actual police car videos
around the country.

#15.  "Relax; the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch
out after you wear them awhile."

#14.  "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a
worthless document.

#13.  "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

#12.  "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? In case you didn't
know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun."

#11.  "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can
write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

#10.  "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it
will help.  Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

#9.   "Warning?  You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that
again or I'll give you another ticket."

#8.   "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk
or not.  Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

#7.   "Fair?  You want me to be fair?  Listen, fair is a place where you go
to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey DOO."

#6.  "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster
oven."

#5.   "No, sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but
now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

#4.  "Just how big were those two beers?"

#3.   "In God we trust, all others we run through GCIC  /  NCIC."

#2.    "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of
yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."

And ....................  THE BEST ONE !!!!!!!

#1   "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't.
Sign here.



Printed May 2, 2024, 8:18 pm
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